The 2010 Rookie Class
Without further ado, I present to you the Funny Money Football League Rookie Class of 2010:
Face – One of the most storied franchises in the history of the original Funny Money, Face has moved over to the young man’s league. His resume speaks for itself: over 35 years of gambling, more trips to Vegas than Dean Martin, and numerous bookies have been left in his wake (most notably, “Pizza Joe” circa 1977). Face has seen it all in his many years in the game, but does he still have the edge to run with the young bucks?
Kiko Garcia – Kiko placed his first bet at the tender age of ten seconds, when he bet his mother’s OB that he could cut his own umbilical cord on the first try. Garcia parlayed the profits from that wager into an all-powerful multi-national betting conglomerate that has, among other things, forced LeBron James to sign with Miami, ordered Steven Strasburg to undergo needless Tommy John surgery, and fixed the 1919 World Series. He now looks to conquer the FMFL.
Ron Mexico – Ron could be considered the “dark horse” of the 2010 rookie class. Not much is known about his gambling past. He wears his passions on his sleeve, which include Joe Buck, the Philadelphia Eagles, and hardwood floors. A business colleague of FMFL veteran Gordon Bombay, does Ron have the stones to make it through seventeen weeks of the gambling roller coaster?
Will Cover – Will was recruited into FMFL after developing his talent on the collegiate football gambling circuit. Inspired by Chad Ochocinco’s name change and a banner year in 2008, Will legally changed his last name from “Shatner” to “Cover.” After enduring the struggling economy and a few terrible bets in a devastating 2009, Will is hoping the 2010 FMFL season brings him out of the depths of depression and offers a new chance to return to glory.
(special thanks to Art Schlichter, The Beard of Zeus, and Gordon Bombay for their contributions to this post)