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Funny Money Power Rankings – Week 7

Brian Piccolo surges into the playoff picture with a $1,000 week. He won his wild card despite Ryan Fitzpatrick’s best effort to rally the Bengals against the Jets. For the most part, other franchises stayed where they were last week, with the exception of Boss Hardigan who took a $500 hit, and Blossom Russo and Chris B. Corey, who each won $500. The Giants’ loss on Monday night prevented a lot of franchises from perfect weeks.

Here are your updated power rankings:

Biggest rise: Brian Piccolo: was 13, now 4
Biggest drop: Thunder Lips: was 5, now 10

(Last week’s rank; Current total)

1. Gordon Bombay (1; $1,900)

Increased his divisional and overall lead, but late picks prevented him from reaching the $2,000 mark.

2. Kimmy Gibbler (2; $1,500)

Secured the lead in the South for another week, but something tells me that Week 7 is the week he drops down.

3. Bayonnaise (4; $1,400)

Stayed quietly in second place in his division and within earshot of the overall lead.

4. Brian Piccolo (13; $1,100)

A HUGE week vaulted Piccolo into second place in the West, but will he fall right back into his $100 win or loss pattern? Time will tell.

5. Karl Farbman (6; $1,300)

Took over the West lead due to Hardigan’s fall from the top, but has Piccolo nipping at his heels.

6. The People’s Champ (7; $1,200)

Began the week looking as if he was going to make a big move, but his chances faded off like an Eli Manning pass.

7. Boss Hardigan (3; $1,000)

Lost $500. Lost his Speedo. Grew a mustache.

8. Teddy KGB (8; $1,000)

Fell further behind the overall leader, and is currently on the outside looking in for the playoffs.

9. Blossom Russo (10; $800)

Big $500 week and it looks as if fatty Russo will take over Babe this week in the East.

10. Thunder Lips (5; $900)

Another five teamer, yawn. Zzzzzzzz.

11. Babe (9; $900)

“This is why we can’t have nice things.”

12. Mr. Marbles (11; $400)

Time for the wild card bet? I think so. I think so.

13. Chris B. Corey (19; -$100)

Back from the dead, Chris B. Corey is close to positive money! To celebrate, he plans to throw out the first pitch at an Indians game.

14. The 21th Precinct (12; $0)

Should the Precinct follow Piccolo’s lead and go for the gusto before he falls further behind?

15. Rick Moranis (16; -$300)

Late picks cost him an additional $100, but he’s moving closer to the Equator.

16, Waldo Geraldo Faldo (15; $-100)

Brown water season has hurt his wagering.

17. The Phoenix (14; -$500)

Boring.

18. Bummy (18; -$400)

More boring.

19. Mr. DeBlasis (17; $-600)

DeBlasis is fading away, slowly but surely, and needs to turn things around fast as the halfway point of the season approaches.

20. The Beard of Zeus (20; -$1,400)

It looks like the end for the Beard.

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